I created a video for you with 11 simple things to do right when you become a widow. Hope you can use it and please share it with others who may find it useful!


11 simple things to do right when you become a widow. I was not expecting to be a widow at such a young age. It felt like I jumped on a treadmill and couldn’t get off! While on this WILD RIDE, I discovered 11 simple things to do right when you become a widow:

  1. You will be in a fog, some call it “widows fog”. It feels like you are in a dream and can’t think clearly, so write everything down.
  2. Keep a journal. You will forget a lot (sometimes you may hope this is the case!) But when you read back to previous writing you will see how far you have come.
  3. Contact your local Social Security Office. Schedule an appointment ASAP to find out if you have any survivor benefits.
  4. Many people will have advice on every topic. Be cautious about who you take advice from. Have they been through something similar? Are they deeply educated on this topic? Please get professional financial advice. *Consider keeping your finances confidential.
  5. Remember Everyone grieves differently. Do NOT compare yourself to others. Nobody has walked in your shoes.
  6. Consider counseling for you and your family. It could be grief counseling, a life coach, in school, group therapy, etc.  
  7. Join groups for grief and loss. They can be in-person or on social media. They help you know that you are NOT alone. There are some really good ones for children. (SLC, Utah: look at The Sharing Place)
  8. Self-care is crucial. Eat, sleep, take naps, exercise, let others help, be SUPER kind to yourself, etc. We wouldn’t let our cell phone batteries get down to 0% so why would we let ourselves?  
  9. Fill your mind with POSITIVE THOUGHTS. Such as I can do hard things.
  10. Move your body when you feel sad, frustrated, etc. Science has proven that physical activity helps the brain in many positive ways.  
  11. Most importantly remember YOU HURT BECAUSE YOU LOVED AND LOVE IS A GOOD THING!