change after the loss of a loved one

Change is uncomfortable. But this earthly life we are living is changing all the time. Change is especially prominent after the loss of a spouse or loved one. Pretty much everything changes- who we wake up to, who we communicate with daily, and who we put all of our love into.

One of my favorite quotes I say all the time to myself and my kids is, “If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.” Maya Angelou.

Well, I didn’t like the change after Jay died, so I got to change my attitude. I had to make myself look for the good in all situations. Yes I know it’s hard to find at the beginning, but when you really try each day to change your habits of how you think about this situation, it becomes easier. Kind of like lifting weights- it becomes easier to lift 10 pounds after you have been doing it for a few weeks.

Our brains are powerful. What you tell it each day is what it believes. I promise you can change the way your brain processes. It has been proven by scientists and psychologists that no matter what your age, you can change the way you think.

Try it! I have done it and at the beginning, it feels like a lie or like it is not going to work, but after days of telling yourself positive things over and over, you begin to believe it. Tell yourself something like this every day- “Everything works for me.” or “I am worth staying for.” I write them on my mirror with a glass marker. These are called positive affirmations. You can look it up and see what other thoughts work for you. Some say this is wishful thinking, who cares! It’s your body and soul we are talking about right now and it deserves to remove all negativity and make positive changes. Give it everything you’ve got. You are worth it.

Affirmations by Louise Hay: ( for more)

Today is going to be a really, really good day.

I handle my own life with joy and ease.

I flow easily with new experiences, new challenges, and new people who enter my life.

I love myself just the way I am.

I am worth loving. There is love all around me.

I forgive myself and set myself free.

Today is the future I created yesterday.

Every experience I have is perfect for my growth.

I now choose to release all hurt and resentment.

Louise Hay has been a great influence in my life. She passed away in 2017 at age 90, but her love lives on today through her many books and her Hay Foundation. She talks about healing your body and wrote one of my favorite books. You Can Heal Your Life

you can heal your life Louise Hay