We do have choices! Choice is defined as an act of selecting or making a decision when faced with two or more possibilities. It is a gift we have so many choices in this day and age, but sometimes it is overwhelming! Once again, we all are different so we go about deciding things […]
I have heard many people say, “I didn’t sign up for this”, or “I didn’t ask for this.” It makes me wonder what everyone thinks they signed up for? This is what I believe- we knew this life was going to be hard when we wanted to come to this earth. I believe we knew […]
Now that the funeral is over you will start getting a ton of mail. It was overwhelming to me! My mom came to my house a couple of times a week to help me sort it out, call who I needed to, turn in important papers, deal with life insurance, apply for Social Security, etc. […]
Was my heart ripped apart when Jay passed away? Absolutely! But I realized that the heart muscle does heal – just like any other muscle in my body. Also, I figured out over time that when you work your muscles – like your legs while running or biking, you create little tears in your muscle […]
When do I start dating again after loss? Everyone has A LOT to say about this when you start considering entering the dating scene again. Maybe more than any other thing! BUT nobody has lived your life, so I don’t think it’s their choice! Even if they have been your best friend throughout your whole […]
I have learned that being grateful may be the best thing to help me through ups and downs. Yes, some days that is hard to do. But if I just look around there is so much to be grateful for- my very breath, love, I feel for those around me, this beautiful earth, and pure […]
Teens are very unique and act that way. So you will need to think of them individually with their personalities and what they have been through. Think through a few of these things on how to support a teenager. There is not a wrong or right way how to do this. Talking to your teen […]
Just like the 4-minute mile- nobody thought it was possible for a person to run one mile faster than 4 minutes, but as soon as Roger Bannister did it in 1954, 2 runners- just 2 months later- ran it faster. You, too, can do this hard thing. Loss may feel like a marathon, but you’ll […]
Apparently many people who have NOT lost someone close to them, don’t understand that you will NEVER get “over this”. I didn’t understand before it happened to me, so I am patient with others who say comments such as, “Haven’t you moved on yet? It’s been a year!” Or, “I think you should be over […]
It took me quite a few years to change my perception of my life as a victim. I had felt safe in the pain of being a victim. People felt sorry for me. I didn’t have to do anything I didn’t want to do because I was the poor casualty. Nobody was going to change […]
After the loss of a loved one or any big change, fitness may change as well. Why in the world would I talk about fitness when it’s hard to just get out of bed? There are huge benefits of exercise for the mind and body. When people get hurt they do physical therapy as soon […]
My friend and attorney, David Wood, wrote this. It’s helpful and comforting. What’s a widow to do- not only emotionally, but legally? In 2009, my mother became a widow. Dad’s health had been poor for several years so it wasn’t much of a surprise when he was taken to the emergency room one last time. […]
Oh, I found out I didn’t fix all my perfectionism on that breakdown I had in 2000. I’ve had other times where I had to become real- like when my husband passed away. A few days after Jay passed away, one of my lifelong best friends, Becky, came over to visit with me. She knows […]
Oh no! The 3-month mark?! 100 days after Jay had passed was the hardest time I have had in the 10 years since his loss. At this point, the numb feeling wore off and I began to realize he wasn’t coming back and I really was a widow. For people who have never lost anyone […]
You are still whole. Even though you feel like half of you is gone. I know your heart has been ripped out, but you are still 100% person. You aren’t 1/2 person like half of you has been taken from your body. Look you probably still have 2 legs and 2 arms. Emotionally it seems […]
